Tuesday, March 31, 2009

But It Hurts

OMG what the heck is up with my boobies? They have been massively sore since O and I feel like I'm fondling myself constantly. Last night Steve had a beer with dinner and being the beer snob that he is, it was a new and terrific beer I had yet to try. He offered me a sip and when I declined he said "Come on, it could make your boobs feel better, you never know it could be the miracle cure." I couldn't help but crack up although I still refused the sip because my throat was feeling sore and it just didn't sound good.

So today my boobs are aching, my throat is sore and my temp is still up. Come on BFP who know you wanna show up this cycle!!!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

My charts gone crazy!





















Seriously chart, what are you doing to me? FF can't decide what it thinks this month. Given that OPK's are designed to tell you that you will ovulate in the next 24 to 48 hours and I got a barely positive around 6pm Friday night, I find it highly unlikely that I O'd on CD12. That being said, if I take the + OPK out, up until yesterday it would change my O date to CD14 (which is my personal favorite of all possible days). Well as of this mornings temp, if I take away the + OPK it changes my O date to CD15. Seriously I am just as confused as you FF. I have had no really good CM (thank god for preseed, allthough I only used it on Sunday) and my CP is all wrong. Can the spermies get through on a "medium" open cervix? And dont get me started on the incline by 2 tenths of a degree each day, WTF?

So given all that, Im hoping that my ugliest chart ever gets me a BFP. My last shot at a 2009 baby. Of course if it doesn't and I have better luck next month I will be due around the same date as my BFF's baby girl that was born this year. I'd take that too!

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Gotta get our BFP this month

Of course when a life altering event is scheduled the first thing I do is check out my chart to see how I will be affected. Looks like Steve and I have to do our bestest to get a BFP this month because they scheduled him for shoulder surgery (again, see below) a week after(*edit* I meant before, who cares if its after, lol) I would supposedly O next month. Seeing as we have a hard enough time with positions now with a bum shoulder, I'll be lucky if he's not hopped up on so many drugs next month that its impossible.

So I'll be doing everything I can to make things happen this month, give me all the superstitions you've got because I'll most lilkely give in to every one of them.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

What's going on here?

I have no clue which I'm waiting for anymore, AF or a BFP. I'm 14dpo took a pg test today and yesterday, both BFN and I have no clue if AF is coming or not. I have had very mild cramps the last 3 days, yesterday and today I got nauseas after a meal with my vitamins and was uncontrollably burping and my boobs are sore but I haven't had a single spot of color in my CM, which I have probably checked at least 15 times since yesterday morning. I'm taking B-6 to lengthen my LP and its either working really really well or Im pg and my body just doesn't want to admit it yet. Temps are still up so I guess we'll see tomorrow if they remain. I figured I'd have a cut and dry answer by now. I only have one $tree test left so if tomorrow I don't get an answer I'll be getting more and keep testing everyday until AF shows or I get a BFP.

I would love love love to be pg so Im of course hoping that's the direction it goes but if my body would cooperate sooner rather than later that would be wonderful. Tomorrow will be day 1 of the 3rd week on my 2ww, and hello...they call it a 2ww for a reason. Still holding out for my little turkey!!

Friday, March 6, 2009

Trying to keep up hope

I'm 12dpo today, no sign of spotting (which I normally get) and I'm trying to convince myself that this very slight cramping I feel is me over analyzing and that I ate something totally different and way early for breakfast. I keep thinking that I feel the AF and everytime I run to the bathroom there is nothing there and my CM is the normal clear/white sticky. I mean there would be spotting by now right? I get it every month.

I wanted so badly to test this morning and now Im realizing maybe a BFN isn't so bad, it's kind of better than going to the bathroom every 20 minutes to see if AF showed yet. BUT I had to take my mom to the airport and I have a plan on how to tell Steve when I do get KTFU and I just wouldn't have had time to enjoy the moment this morning had it been a BFP.

This wait sucks, tomorrow can't come fast enough and neither can my BFP.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Kaiser SUCKS!!!

Steve has had shoulder problems for years, he works construction so with the lifting and working above his head (he's a glaizer aka glass guy) it comes to be expected. Well he got to a point in life where he would rather not continue to tolerate the constant pain and went to the doctor. They did an MRI and said he had a slight tear in his rotator cuff and it could be fixed via surgery with 6-8 weeks recovery.

So we schedule the surgery for about a month after our wedding on Aug 22, 2008. Day of surgery doctors tells him he's going to go in and fix the tear and while he's in there he'll remove arthritis from the bones to give more room for the tendon. When he gets out of surgery they tell him there was no tear but they took the arthritis off, WTF? What happened to the tear?

He starts seeing a Physical Therapist once a week and is recovering faster than they expected as far mobility goes. Well come week 4 that bascially stops, no more improvement and he is in constant pain that is preventing him from sleeping. They give him a cortizone shot and some sleeping pills, good ol' Kaiser and their drugs. Well the sleeping pills didn't last long, they worked for about 2 days and then not anymore, plus they interfered with baby making because little man never wanted to play. The cortizone allowed him to work out with the elastic bands but he was still in constant pain.

Next thing you know his physical therapist says there is nothing else she can do for him and will only see him once every 10 days. He continues to work it out himself and finds another therapist (kaiser of course because they refuse to out source you). Let me also say that this is after 3-3.5 months so almost double his supposed recovery time. He starts seeing the other therapist once a week and pretty much has gotten complete mobility back in his shoulder but has no muscle to lift, which is required to do his job. He starts hitting up the gym 3-4 times a week doing light weights on his shoulder and lots of cardio to get rid of the tire he has now developed that makes him VERY self consious.

Two weeks ago he saw the PT for the last time, there is now nothing else she can do for him based on the guidelines and rules set out by Kaiser. Still with very little muscle and now almost 6 months down the road he asks to see the doctor/surgeon again. They send him in to have an MRI and his appointment with the doctor was today. Oh and did I mention that his disability got cut off as of February 26th and if he is not back to work by April his union drops his insurance.

So the doctor today says that Steve now has a 50% tear in his Rotator Cuff and his only options are another cortizone shot (which is far from candy) to work through the pain, to have surgery again and fix the tear or to continue rehab and hope it gets better. Well isn't that flippin lovely!!! How the hell did a 50% tear magically apear when it wasn't there 6 months ago (even though it was there 3 months prior to that) when he has had 1/16th, if that, of the strain he normally puts on his shoulder.

Now his options are to 1) be in constant pain and take another cortizone shot that could potentially do more damage than its worth and go back to work 2) have another surgery and hope that he recovers quickly but most likely it would be double recovery than this time so potentially a year off with no pay and no insurance after May (even though I can add him to my insurance) or 3) do more therapy with no pay and under my insurance which is an HSA pay out of pocket for the first $1500 until I can switch in July.

Granted we can live on my income but not with added expenses of PT and paying for his insurance, well okay maybe we could do that but life would royaly suck! I hate Kaiser, they just made up my mind about switching to them when we get pg. I'll stick with my insurance thanks!

Monday, March 2, 2009

Cart well before horse

But I couldn't help it and wanted to keep this somewhere so I can hopefully purchase it sooner rather than later!!!



http://tinyurl.com/cwtkjz