Supply Supply Supply

You know, before I got pregnant, I never knew that breastfeeding can be deemed a luxury. I thought it was just natural and your body just did it whether you liked it or not. If you went in planning to formula feed (like most of my friends had) then you just dealt with the pain of rock hard boobs for a while and then moved on. You made the rules! Boy was I mistaken! I knew I wanted to breastfeed, I actually had the mind set that my phantom baby would ONLY consume breast milk for the first year of their life. I'll admit, I was very naive about how things worked before I ever tried to get pregnant. Thankfully I wised up for the most part prior to conceiving, lol.

Now here we are, when all those thoughts seemed years ago (technically it was over two years ago), and I have an almost 8 month old and uncooperative boobs. I regret now not taking a breast feeding class, I'd gladly switch that for the stupid birthing class we paid for...I knew what was going to happen there, I didn't need to pay $120 for that! Had I known breast feeding could potentially be such a struggle, I would have pumped like a mad woman and used those engorged breasts for every drop they were worth.

Now I sit, popping 3 Fenugreek and 2 Blessed Thistle pills three times a day, kicking myself for not making lactation cookies last night and running to Target instead, trying to stomach this once yummy oatmeal that I've willingly tainted with Brewers Yeast and wondering how much my pumping efforts today will be short of whats required to feed my child. 4oz, are you fricken kidding me...that's all I was able to pump this morning! Which naturally means I'll be so super lucky if I can 2-3 oz out of my next two pumpings today. I'm down to my last 15oz in the freezer (3 bottles) and the way things are going I'll be lucky to get through the week let alone the weekend. That can of formula is mocking me from the pantry.

I've never worked so hard at something in my life! I spend at least 2 1/2 hours of my day pumping, another 30-40 minutes feeding her from the tap. Then throw in preparing bottles and now solids...even leaving out making my own baby food, I spend more time preparing her food/feeding her daily, than the time I get to spend with her in general. Boooo!

I am bound and flipping determined to get to at least 9 months, preferably on breast milk alone. If I have to supplement, I will, I'm actually not even that bothered by it because I know she will be just fine...it's just not the way I planned. For now I'm sticking with this plan until I'm forced to, no giving up or giving in because the second I do that, cracking that formula can open won't be far behind. So after this long whining vent I'd like to share something I wish I knew:

Stock up early and rotate that milk like your a carnival ride

Oh my 30+ ounce a day boobs, how do I miss thee, let me count the ways!


#7